Every Friday, just about midnight, all my problems seem to disappear.

I’ve been listening to so much music. My brain is going to rot out.

Here it is. The night before I get to go home. My lucky boob brother Aaron got to go home today. This makes me jealous.

He’d better stay outta his present.

I added some of what I needed to add to D’s gift. I hope he likes it. I’m worried he’ll think it’s girly. It’s friggin’ not, though. He said he’s adding a “sprinkle of magic” to my gift that has to do with his homecoming, and whatever it is, I’m not allowed to cheat. I won’t, but:

I wanna know, man.

Goodness.

Going home is going to be a little bittersweet, I think. On the one hand, I get to see everyone I love. My brothers and parents and D. On the other hand, it’s probably going to be the last time I see D before he leaves. It’s kinda hard to think about.

Self, no matter what’s happening, you are not allowed to be clingy. No. No. No.

New topic, mm. I’m getting sad. Lemme see…Oh, I almost finished cleaning my room. My RA has to come to my room and give me the ‘okay’ so I can check out. All packed. Well, not all. I still need things to get ready with in the morning. I’m booking it out at 5:45am. Thinking about staying up all night and sleeping on the plane. If D calls tonight that should knock a few hours out, at least. I love planes.

Planes, planes, planes.

Here’s a plane:



I’m going to be riding in one of these in less than twelve hours. Fun, right? I know!

Check ya later. Gotta work on some shizz.

What?

And now it’s time for:

The Mystery Post…

This post could be about anything. I guess we’ll both know the topic when I decide to stop writing. Assuming there is one.

I’m just a little bored.

Here’s a story.

A few nights ago I went out with some friends and we bought a few Welches grape sparkling ‘wine’ bottles. The Latter Day Saint equivalent to actually drinking wine. Being the rebels that we are, we peeled off the label to make them look legit and enjoyed the finest Chardonnay that was available to us on campus. Good way to loosen up before finals.

So. Many. Bubbles.

We actually became giddy. Must have been the sugar.




Ridiculous.

I love these girls.

So, after we downed our ‘wine’ we decided it would be an awesome idea if we were to drive over to this 24hr truck stop with this restaurant in the back and order some fries. Driving while heavily intoxicated with juice. Great idea. Anyways, I get in the back with Jessica and Amanda; Amanda being in the middle.

Jessica: "Let’s make a Jessica sandwich!"

Amanda: "Who says bread sandwich?"

Me: "…Let’s make an Amanda sandwich!"

There we go. Poor Amanda. Here’s the deal with me. I thrive on making other people feel awkward, I don’t know why, it’s just something I consider to be amazing entertainment. I do it to D all the time. What makes it even better is that after people get all flustered, they try to return the favor, and if you know me at all that’s entirely impossible. My friend Kittie in high school made sure I was used to all forms of her molestation. The greatest part about this is the other Jessica is the same way. I had no idea. It was fabulous. Amanda is not that way, so the car ride was spent (in between jamming to the song “Sexy and I Know It”) making Amanda a jumpy as possible. On both sides.

The awkward game is one of my absolute favorites to play with other people. It usually involves something like stroking their arm or face or running and hand up their leg while retaining direct eye contact. Jessica beat me one time. I didn’t feel awkward, but what she said was so unexpectedly true that I started laughing.

Me: -running my hand up Jessica’s thigh-

Jessica: "-sexy tone- I just unbuttoned my pants."

I couldn’t handle it. I was laughing so much. This occurred while we were sitting in Lehi’s after we had eaten. I guess she had eaten so much her pants wouldn’t close. I hadn’t been aware that she’d unbuttoned her jeans until she said that. I’ll give her that one.

There’s more to that story but I’m switching to something else.

Today is [hopefully] the day I get to leave and get what I need for David’s present. If the Maury Express has stopped running in the Winter I’m totally screwed. We’ll see. Right now I’m waiting for Katy to get out of the shower and get ready so we can go down to the bookstore and get money for the bus and I can turn in my last final. We’re going to have to leave in less than thirty minutes. Now I’m bored.

I’ll update later and let you know what happened.

UPDATE:

Made it.

Mission accomplished.

Flowers during finals.

D has to be the most wonderful person I know. So suave. One of the reasons I love him so much.

Here’s last night’s conversation over the phone:

D: "So, Jess…"

Me: "Yeah?"

D: "Say someone decides to send you something…how does that work, exactly?"

Me: "Well, if it’s a letter, it’ll come straight to my dorm room. If it’s a package or something like that, I’ll get an e-mail to go pick it up from the mail center."

D: "Oh…well, how often do you check your e-mail?"

Me: "Not very often. Only if I’m expecting something that I’ve ordered. Aaron’s present for example…should I be expecting something?"

D: "What? No. I’m just saying you should check your e-mail more often. You know, on the off chance…like tomorrow. Between nine and twelve. In case something goes bad. I’m not saying I sent you anything, I’m just, you know. Just in case."

See? Totally suave. Love that kid.

Anyways, I did as suggested and low and behold I got a package in the mail center. It’s funny because I was still surprised a little bit. I went ahead and walked down from my dorm to check it out and noticed a big green box with the word “Flowers” written on the side. I’d been here earlier around ten-thirty “just in case” so the lady just laughed and handed me the box without asking my name.

I decided to trek all the way back up the hill before opening the box lest something should happen on the way up, which, in hindsight, was an excellent idea. There was a sheet of ice on the hill up to the dorms, and, well:

Ice: 1

Jessica: 0

The back of my jeans are all wet, so I’m sitting in my roommates chair because I’m inconsiderate.

I opened the door to the dorm room and noticed my roommate had gotten out of the shower and was sitting on her bed.

Roommate: "You have flowers."

Me: "Yep."

Roommate: "Oh, D…you guys are so cute."

Me: -sets box on desk-

Roommate: "Open them, open them!"

Me: "I am, I am."

This was all done with the awkward goofy smile I couldn’t seem to peel off my face. The box had a tear away section that decided to put up a bit of a fight but eventually I prevailed. I put together the flower ensemble with the vase and the plant food via the in-box instructions and it’s now sitting happily on my desk. My camera isn’t very good, but check these out:





He got me lilies. My favorite.

I’m so happy.

I will post another picture on here when they decide to bloom. D has once again accomplished cheering me up 100% during an otherwise stressful time period. I don’t know what I’d do without that kid.

UPDATE:
12/13/11

They’ve begun to bloom. Well, maybe they’re a bit past beginning, but definitely getting there. Oh man.








And again as an acrylic still-life painting that I made myself with photoshop. I’m such an artist:




That happened.

Apathy.

So, I’ve noticed that during the past few months I’ve developed that habit of suddenly becoming struck with these debilitating moments of apathy where I can’t continue in a current quest. Usually as I near the point of helpless frustration.

Most of the time this reduces me to dropping onto the floor no matter where I’m located and curling up into a ball until it passes. Much in the way this cat does:




These episodes can last anywhere from ten seconds to half-an-hour.

As finals week approaches, I find myself having more and more of these quick depressing episodes, the last one occurring just a few minutes ago after I couldn’t locate my calculator. It was relatively short, only about fifteen seconds and occurred near the sink by the door.

When I stood up, I immediately located my calculator on the desk nearby in plain sight. I feel like these moments have become a kind of “reset” button.

College is a funny thing.

I don’t feel like doing anything.

Okay, so you know “The Lazy Song” by Bruno Mars? This one:


"Today I don’t feel like doing anything.
I just wanna lay in my bed.
Don’t feel like picking up my phone.
So leave a message at the tone.
‘Cause today I swear I’m not doing anything."

You’re welcome for that.

This came on in the car last night while I was returning from Wal-Mart after a failed attempt at getting something necessary for my boyfriend’s (who I shall refer to as D) Christmas present. Made the mistake of telling him a little too much information when I was speaking with him on the phone later that night. My bad.

I might not have remembered it if it wasn’t the last song that played on the radio. I was squished in the back of a VW Bug with two beautiful people, with two other beautiful people in the front, dancing as much as the cramped space would allow and singing as loudly and off-tune as humanely possible to every rap-type song that played. It was quite entertaining to say the least.

Some guy walking by started singing along with us as we got out of the car.

Anyways, that song by Bruno Mars began playing and I’d heard pieces of it maybe once before, but this time the words were all too clear. I laughed when it occurred to me that this is how I’ve spent my last few weeks in my college dorm. My dorm room looks like a bomb went off. Trash, clothes, opened drawers that are throwing up various items all over the floor. In fact, it would be easy enough to just say that every single piece of furniture in this room appears to be violently ill. I suppose I could be typical and chalk this all up to finals beginning on Monday.

I just don’t feel like doing anything.

And I’m good with that.

Procrastination is the key to unwaivering success.

Well, this morning I was able to take the written portion of my Acting I final. I did study some, though I spent the majority of my time last night denying any sort of responsibility by creating this account.

Other activities that I interested myself in were the stacking of goldfish crackers on my various text and notebooks and finding awkward music mixes in iTunes where soft pieces from the 2002 movie version of “The Phantom of the Opera” ended in an “OH YEA-E-AH,” by Adam Levine.

It was scary the first time.

I should probably un-distract myself from the topic of my distractions and get back onto the topic of my final exam.

I went to bed last night at two-thirty something due to a revelation by my roommate that we had a packet of work due for another class the next morning. So, it was a later night than anticipated, and, as the hours ticked on, I eventually resigned my distracted mindset to sleep because I had at least gone through some of the material. “Don’t worry, self.” I said, “You’ll wake up tomorrow refreshed at 7:45am and be able to review all the note in class that you didn’t go over.” Ha ha ha.

I’m not sure how many times I hit the snooze button, but that didn’t happen.

I ended up being violently awoken by my roommate at 8:45am with my class beginning at 9:00am. And by “being violently awoken” I mean, “Hey Jess?” “Mmm…” “Don’t you have a class at nine, or something? It’s quarter till.” “Crap…”

Somehow I made it on time.

For weeks our professor had worked up the tension. Milking it until we all stood wide-eyed the Wednesday before, completely nerve-wracked. I mentally flagellated myself for not being as responsible as I should have been and for procrastinating so profoundly in my studies. What would I do?

Then the test was passed out.

Question 1:

______________ is which of the following?

a) Superman’s objective for saving the planet.

b) What occurs when diagnosed with Asian bird flu.

c) Perfume used by Madonna.

d) __________________________________ (legitimate answer)

Not word for word, but that’s exactly how it was written. There were at least six like this. It was the silliest thing. I mean, seriously. There was even a question that said, “FREE QUESTION. SELECT ANY ANSWER TO RECEIVE FULL CREDIT.” Those answers said things like, “My professor is awesome,” or “I love Acting.” You know, with how difficult my professor is when he grades things, there was no way I saw this coming.

So simple. It’s almost pathetic how accomplished I feel about it.

I want to discuss something else, now. Something like this:



You're welcome.

Well, that's it. I've become a blogger.

Well, I suppose this is it. I’m blogging. Blogging. The ultimate form of denial when it comes to not actually having a life. I suppose that’s alright. I’m pretty anti-social anyhow.

I’m happy with it.

I suppose I should go ahead and introduce myself.

The name is Jessica, or Jessiker and depending on your point of origin one version might be easier to pronounce than the other. You’re welcome for providing that distinguished explanation of my name. Heck, call me J. Everyone likes shortcuts, right?

Except, of course, Stephen King, and if you’ve read any of his books, you’ll know exactly what I mean.

I’m pretty darn old for someone so young. Or so people say, anyways, though I’m not certain that counts any more with the opening of this account. And also, since I’m creating this account while procrastinating studying for my Acting final. I’m sure that kicks my maturity level down a few notches.

Sadly, it is precisely 7:50pm and my laptop is about to perish for want of charge so I can’t procrastinate nearly as well as I’d like. I figured I might as well give sort of an intro to whatever the heck I’m planning to do with this page.

How many bloggers begin their page with “MY BLOG IS GOING TO BE ALL RANDOM AND FUN ALL THE TIME,” because, I’ll bet there’s quite a few. Sure, I’d like to think I’m going to put a ton of interesting stuff on here that almost no one will see, unless, of course, they do, but hey. I don’t know. Random, I suppose, is one of the best word choices in the english language. Sporadic, as well. I’m not planning on updating on a set schedule. Could be more than once in a day, or haven’t done it in a month.

I’ll be honest, I’ll try to be interesting. If something funny or off the wall happens that would appeal to the general population, I’ll probably mention it. I’m sure not every post will be brimming with excitement. Maybe I’ll post a cool memory one day, seek advice the next. Funny jokes I find, or I may just ramble on with not generalized purpose.

My plan is to not be boring. We’ll see if that plays out.

Welcome, self.

You’re now a blogger.